wanna bet?

HI, my name is paulomee and im addicted to chocolate. its been 2 weeks and ive been struggling.
hhahahaha... no no i wouldnt willingly give up chocolate. lol im the bearer of magnets and stickers that read 'will work for chocolate' 'i would give up chocolate, but im not a quitter' 'chocolate is the cure for all' etc!
so recently i lost a BIGGGG bet with a friend... the stakes were high.
he bet no beer until Christmas and i bet no chocolate until Christmas... and by gosh, i lost. so yes... i have been chocolate less for the past 2 weeks. now can u imagine how hard it is.. not cause im addicted. that is partially the reason, but its cause CHOCOLATE IS EVERYWHERE.

its in ice cream, granola bars, milk, cookies, cereal, MOCHA drinks and coffee, brownies, pie, chocolate syrup, candy, Godiva (love iittt), chocolate mints, chocolate strawberries, nutella, hot coco....etc. yes, there's always options for chocolate less things, and most things like cereal and stuff - i dont even like chocolate in them. ITS THE REMINDER.. its when you see it and ure reminded that you cant have it, you want it. its the FORBIDDEN FRUIT and its much more enticing to me since its forbidden...

its quite annoying, but none the less ive had only 2 mistakes. i ate mint chocolate chip ice cream by mistake and chocolate cereal by mistake. usually my favorite cereal is raisin nut branch (love ittttttt) or honey nut branch or something like that -- but we were out and all i saw was coco puffs. ALTHOUGH, i am trying hard to stay away from it.

so lets see how long i last.... im taking bets on who thinks how long i'll last.
im supposed to last till december 25th. from today onwards i want bets on when YOU think my next slip up will be...
whoever wins gets one wish that shall be granted by me.. now now be reasonable with ure wish.. and u can wish for anything expect something insane like "buy me a computer or gimme a million dollars".

lets see who wins.!!!!

sorry guys, i havent quite been around in the past couple days... school's been super busy and all the billion projects are catching up to me. since, this is the last academic quater, its wrap up time, with only 5 more weeks to go.

so bear with me for couple for days... may be weeks.
sorry that i havent quite visited any of ure sites either... hopefully soon =)

micchami dukkadam..

so like my sister said in her post paryushan again that our paryushan ended on saturday and it was that time of the year for saying micchami dukkadam. please refer to her post, micchami dukkadam for what that means in depth. it just technically means that you forgive and forget things when someone says it to u and ask for forgivenes from someone by saying "micchami dukkadam" ure self. BASICALLY start off with a clean slate... atleast thats how i look at it...


so i had been thinking about it.. i havent said it to anyone this year. i decided that this year on, im only gonna say if i mean it. therefore, i havent said it to anyone yet.

in my long long long hours of thinking i could come up with a list of people i wanted to really say sorry to.

1. family - well my mom's a super mom with all the meals ready whenevery i want, whatever i want. she even wakes up at 5am sometimes to make me coffee when i have finals.. she does my laundry without asking and well helps me clean the MESS of a room i have =).. my dad, he's always there. he's like my little financial calender and accountant. hehee.. i write the checks, and he deposits them or mails them in and well sometimes he even pays my bills for me =). if i ask for a binder, he'll buy me 10. hahaha... if i complain there's no chocolate one day, i'll have 3 packets the next. i've always gotten more than i asked for from him, even though he has struggled enough to give it to me. hmm my brother, i definitely dont give him enough credit for being the awesome brother that he is. he works SUPER hard at work... and still comes home and listens to me whine some most occasions. he's one of those "nice guys". he treats his girls like a LADY... and I LOVE THAT ABOUT HIM. he's been hurt and used before, but yet, he's a gentleman. i really respect that about him, because well we all know how hard it is find a good guy. my sister -- well she is pretty nice. listens to me whine, bitch, moan and what not - not only on this silly blog, but thru emails, voicemails, phone calls, online msgs, chat, and lol if i could, i would leave her text msgs as well. hahahaha..
she's always there to cheer me and tell me im awesome.

SO I ask for forgiveness if i have hurt any of my family members this year, and im sure i have.

lastly, im not trying to be all great and awesome, but i wanna also forgive and forget two things that happened to me in the past year:
1 - being cheated on by my bf of 4 years, having that girl be his fiance and them getting married within days. the details are in SEVERAL previous posts, what that was pretty drastic shock. although, he rescued me and flew me back when i was stranded at the airport. so since then ive tried my best to come to terms with what happened and forgive and forget it all. his wife is also suffering from multiple sclerosis, so ive been helping him out with medical stuff. so im glad, i can forgive and forget that -- i never thought it would be in me to do so.

2. - being stranded at the airport. lord knows u guys have heard about that several times. i want to forgive and forget that. i've spoken to the guy after this... we've talked about it and well EVERYONE IS ENTITLED TO ONE REALLY REALLY SHITTY DECISION IN THEIR LIVES. this was his. i know ive made some really shitty decisions in my life that have affected other people poorly, so i had to let go.

ive also realized that its better to let go. im not saying right away.. geez me and my ex broke up in june of 2006, and its september of 2007 - and im finally TRYING to forgive and forget it. TRYING BEING THE KEYWORD. so u gotta be mad initially, cause if ure not, that will give the person the right to walk all over you any number of times. u gotta be mad, and u gotta keep ure space away from that person, but whenever ure ready to let go, u should. its not good for you to keep grudges for ever. when you hold a grudge for ever you tend to become bitter - no reason to be bitter. =).

so there's my micchami dukkadam to all, its a week late, but better now than never right? and atleast i TRUELY mean it this year.

metamorphosis....

its a ritual.... everytime a quater ends, and another begins - i take all the notes from the classes in the previous quater --> organize them into lovely binders by class and date and etc --> file them away in my tall ass blookshelf and make room for the new quater.

well this year i was a little lazy... hehe cause its the 3rd week of the new quater and i just did it. as i organized everything i found all my old albums from highschool and undergraduate years. i obviously flipped through them and WHOA influx of crazyyy memories.

this post isnt about the memories -- its about how ive changed over the years.

i remember loving earings when i was little.. then i got out of it.. and now im back into it. i love earings.
i remember HATING make up when i was high school -- i never put on make up until i was in college.. and now i do it almost every day. although, i dont have the perfect skin i used to have back in the teen years. can u believe it i went thru the teen years without a single pimple. fascinating eh? although i do love eye make up..
i used to be a tom boy up until well 4-5 years ago. hehehe.. yea my first skirt was bought by my sister when i was 16 - i never wore it. i used to HATE IT. then well obviously, i started getting into it because well -- actually i dont know why? hmmmm interesting.. but whatever..
definitely as i grew up, no matter how tom boyish i was in my dressing style - i was still fascinated by purses and shoes...

never can u have enough of those two!!

always had these phases i went in and out off.. it wasnt that i changed what i liked. always liked that stuff -- its just that i changed what i liked WHEN i liked it. its not like it was defined by my environment cause ud think id be a girly girl attending a all girls private school in india.. hahaha - quite the opposite actually.

its my own little metamorphosis.. weird how u can tell the changes when u look through years of photographs... i mean i'll try scan some of me back in the days when i was 10, 15, 18, etc... so u guys can see the difference. i probably wont, lol -- it was a good idea, but im well frankly, dont have time between school, work and the non-existant life with all the extra projects added onto the "if u want to graduate, u must complete this" claus.

so i wanna know what kinda phases have u guys been in and out of? what phase are you in now? were u consistent or kinda like me growing up??

jack and pooj went DOWN the hill???????

**********UPDATE**********
guys... this isnt LIKE what ure thinking. its A FUN small cute little hill. its soft and fluffy with grass.. geez. its not crazy that im tryign to kill my self. hahaha.

so this weekend was mighty eventful.....

on friday, i went up to visit some of my friends that i hadnt seen in forever... and well i hadnt been on campus in months as well. ahhh the campus where i spent 4 years doing extremely stupid things. one of many is .........................................................
rolling down the hill === now ure thinking hmm did she just say rolling down the hill?? yes yes, i did. as simple as it may be, u lay on one ure sides and ROLL down the hill = OMG, it super fun. now if its snow... u find a piece of wood (sled type thing) and sit on it and HANG ON tight and have somone push u down.. but in the spring, summer and fall - U ROLL down it sideways.

how do you make it a SPORT u might wonder? welllllll here's how....

i lived in the heart of campus, right across the quad, where such a hill that i mention of exists. the hill is just the perfect size, not too big, not toooo steep and has grass once it ends. it is very important for it to have grass on the bottom.. do not roll down a hill where there is gravel or pavement or concrete on the bottom (that would qualify under EXTREME HILL ROLLING). this i say because a) ive done it and its not pretty. u end up huge bruises and blisters and what not. b) its not very smart or safe, i obviously wasnt thinking. why would u willingly roll into gravel?????????????
lol, im not into extreme sports YET.. hahahaha. i know i know what ure thinking. why did i do it? well there was grass on the bottom, i just didnt think i'd keep rolling and GO into the gravel =(.

so on our way back from the all the bars we obviously passed this hill cause well i lived across from it. many nights i layed there with friends drunk staring into the stars and one fine day we had a not that smart idea of "rolling down the hill". since then we do it as a tradition and turned into a sport as in "who can roll down the hill the most times and NOT puke".
there are different classes you can compete within..
1. the drunk
2. the mighty drunk
3.the obliterated/TRASHED

i am a champion of all 3 classes!!!! BOO YA! ALTHOUGH, i almost lost my title in the trashed categories when my friend beat my score of 5 rolls, but i chugged 2 more beers, got trashed and regained my title by beating his score and rolling down 7 times. YEAA!!!!!!!

if not as a sport.. try it, it is SUPER fun... i promise. =)

oh this is my 4th 1st 50th post. ... how does one have 4 first 50th posts??? well i've had 4 different blogs guys...
first one was right here on blogspot.. called the "tales of the glorious globes" - open only to friends.
second was on xanga - a more private blog called "my adventures .. one day at a time" -- open only to intimate friends/sister
third one was here on blog spot... as chocolteluva, called the same as above after my sister persuaded me to go more public. =) im glad she did.

once random family and unknown creepy readers infilterated that blog, i abandoned it and moved HERE. .. to Xocolatl..... my bitter sweet memories. a title that does fit SO well. if u wanna know the meaning of my title click here!

so i hope my smart and huggable self has entertained you guys so far and i hope i keep doing it and dont have to move blogs FOREVER. hehehehe.. i hate moving things...

Will The Father !!!

****UPDATED*****
this post is in sections ---
WOMAN DOENST NEED A MAN....
no society should make a woman feel that way... inaddition what society and peer pressure makes a girl feel EXHILED if she doesnt have a bf????

all goes back to mine and keshi's posts.. mine single and happy -- oxymoron? and i think keshi's is linked within the post. did you know that it is illegal for an employer to ask you your marital status at an interview?
WHY???? cause if ure a women and ure married, it is more likely that u'll be pregnant and ask for a maternal leave. This is the kinda prejudice world we live in.

so why is that even though we live in the 21'st century, women is still looked to be defined as if she's with someone or not, cause obviously if she isnt with someone there's something WRONG with her.

i can babble about this here and shout it off the moutain tops, but people who are narrow minded will always remain as such. as sad as it is. im proud of the women i come across on the blog here - im proud to say that atleast all of us are strong and CAN STAND UP FOR OUR SELVES. atleast WE DONT DEFINE our selves by the presence or absence of a man.

so WHY HAVE I BEEN SILENT FOR THE PAST COUPLE DAYS???????

WELLLLLLL i fell down the stairs in my house and hurt my lady humps.... lol yess i hurt my buttocks and my back pretty bad. its just i cant sit for too long, my spine cant handle that much compression... but its getting better. =).... im feeling better as days pass by. although my brother is having a ball coming up with new jokes. i have fallen once before and that was 7 years ago, he still calls me "superwoman wanna be" ... god knows what name will stick after this one.

NEEDY???
so here i am talking to a guy friend, i had dated him a while ago... i mean this is like in undergrad, for a month. we've always been good friends after that .. so while leaving i say "omg, im soo glad u came out.. thanks for being there when i needed u".
he says "ohhh... its flattering and all but isnt it UNHEALTHY for you to need me like that"
HMM STOP THE FUCKING TRAFFIC??
get ure head out of ure ass, or im gonna have to pry it out. as soon as he said that.. i totally laughed out loud. i mean OUT LOUD and i said "geez, get a hold of ure self... i woulda said it to anyone, girl/guy whoever". he said that he just wanted to make sure i wasnt falling for him or anything. all i wanted to do was thank him cause he drove 50 miles to my house to hang out with me. usually we'd meet half way... but i cant drive too far, cause of my back and butt pain from the fall - and the reason i said the "needed you" part was cause i did 'NEED" a friend to go out and i was SUPER thankful that he agreed to drive out this far on a weekday. geez, thats the last time im nice enough to thank him for coming out with me. is it that bad for a girl to say "thanks for being there when i needed you" to a guy?????????????????????? or are men just this shallow??? or is it just MEN IN MY LIFE. loll

the title????
OH lol -- what does the title have anything to do with the POST? well my friend doesnt like to curse.. and we were sitting by kids one day studying.. and i was like MOTHER OF LORD.. and she wanted to say What the FUCK.. but didnt want to curse.. so she said
WILL THE FATHER... the initials are still WTF and pretty safe to use around kids and ure not cursing if ure one of those non cursers..
so since then its one our little 'inside jokes'. i use it when im EXTREMELY FRUSTRATED and no curse word will cover my feelings..... so instead of using 1000 curse words to say how i feel, i just say WILLL THE FATHER!!!
its one of those you had to be there things.. hehehehe

HMM SAY WHAT?

ok so here we go... this is why im starting to think ALL MEN ARE SCUM...
so mc.steamy -- yes mc. steamy -- ive never written about him, but he was my first omg i love him and his dreamy eyes and smile person. he was super hot, and every girl wanted him... ahhh. he was the hunk of the school.... hmmmm
yes, we dated in highschool and a little bit of undergrad, but of course i broke up with him when i realized he was cheating on me. so didnt talk to him much after that. 5 years later, about a year ago we patched up our old differences and decided to be "friends". now the word "friends" here means -- if i run into u in public, i wont spill whatever food item or beverage im holding in my hand on u or wont kick u in the nuts passing by. when i meant friends i meant, i'll be civilized to you should the occasion arise....
so in the past year, we've spoken about 3 to 4 times... and recently this summer he started coming online more often and msg'in me more often. so i said whatever, he's harmless, he's engaged ... almost married to the love of his life... and i was super happy for him.
so i asked him "ooo when's the wedding" and he said "oh about a month away, and this is gonna be my month of fun, away from the fiance"
and he kept hinting at this month of fun, so i figured ok -- lets ask him about it. i did... and he said he wanted to do "fun bachelor things..."

** A HUGE HONKING RED LIGHT GOES OFF IN MY HEAD .. SCREAMING DANGER DANGER DANGER** but im thinking, ok that was the old mc.steamy.. now he's more like a mc.safety. so i wrote it off as im the perverted one and i should give him the benefit of the doubt.

then he says "know anyone to have fun with? how about you? you dont even count cause we dated before, and well i wouldnt be lying to her if she even asks about anything, cause we dated before"

SAY WHAT? hmmm EXCUSE ME???? did you just --- MY THAT IS FORWARD. I DONT COUNT???????/
men of the world is that true???? if u've been with someone, half a decade later u be with them again, it doesnt count??
what if i was speaking sexually here? are you saying ure # doesnt go up again, well cause its the same women, and since ure # doesnt go up again, ITS OK CAUSE IT DOESNT COUNT in a manner of speaking? that is one TWISTED asss logic. women be sure to get the 'years' ure men have been with these so called "number" of women. cause it could be only 5 women, but the 5th one was yesterday... and uve been dating him for 2 months or geez even about to marry him.

here i was mad at me for not giving him the benefit of the doubt that he deserved. mc.safety my asss -- mc.creppy is more like it.
right i was. once a scumbag, always a scumbag. now now dont get me wrong.. HE'S A HOT PIECE OF ASS.. but a hot piece of scumbag ass!!! geez.

i left and i blocked him from my list. geeeezzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz, lol i think he got my answer right there.

well what they say is true "ONCE A CHEATER, ALWAYS A CHEATER!"

i've always thought to my self.. lol this only happens in the movies or on TV. hmmmm perhaps me and my little adventures might be on the big screen one day... watch out for it. lol... cause weird ex's dont come back half a decade later with creepy proposals of sex before they are about to get married TO EVERYONE. geezzzz, glad i dumped him whenever i did.
this only happens in pooja's life.. hahahahahaha!!!!

the most awaited pictures

this is an ACUTAL WORKING clock.. fascinating isnt it???

Life style of the rich -- assholes.. a big house by the river and a f'in boat. i wanna be richhhh

me.... after not showering for 2 days... loved the sunset in the background, couldnt resist.

hanging in there

ooo i took this one for ya for aditi

Whats up DOC?

i dont know why, but i LOVE this picture

it was prettyyyyy

roughing it

since i had never been camping and that idea baffeled my friends -- they decided it was about time i "roughed it". so we celebrated my daddy's b'day on the wednesday and on thursday i left for camping...
i had lunch with a friend and left to go to rockford. now the original plan was to go to dekalb, but parts of dekalb were STILL flooded from the thunderstorm 2 weeks ago. so we didnt want to take a chance and get stuck passing thru those parts to the camp site. so we detoured about 30 miles..
since my friend had a late class on thursday, we decided to stay in rockford because u cant go the camp site after a certain time.. (weird, that i can stay there in the dark, but cant set up shop). we prepped for camping on thursday - went and got groceries like grahm crackers, chocolate, marshmellows, mini kegs, BREAD, alot more BREAD, burgers and hot dogs and well more beer and bread... hahaha
anyways... so we got there at like 7am on friday, which meant we woke up at 5:30 (AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH). got there, set up shop and by now it was 9'ish..
went for a hike and collected fire wood.
on our hike we found pretty water falls and such.. but stupid pooja forgot her camera in the purse, which she wasnt allowed to bring, cause WE WERE ROUGHING IT. no cellie, no credit cards no nothing. only one person got a cellphone in case of emergency. not like there were outlets to charge it or anything (hahahaha).

came back from the hike and we decided that pooja needed to learn how to swim (yes i dont know, and NO i was not part of the decision). so pooja was then thrown into the lake... lake with nasty water... fish and water snakes.. YIPEE FUCKING KAYEEE.
so not excited about that.. i decided to get out and chase 'em all... while i was running amock - i almost ran into a deer.. :(.
he was running one way, and i was running one way... it breaked and looked at me like WTF BITCH. i wanted to pet it, and it wanted to attack me. thanks D for saving me...
there were little bunnies everywhere too... and i ignored the rest of the animals so as to sleep in peace.

came back and oo guess what we ate.. same thing we had for breakfast and same thing we had for lunch -- burgers and hot dogs.. and more smores. hahaha cant get too creative when ure camping. i was bunking it with a guy .. since well i was there with 5 guys and 2 other girls, who well were girlfriends of the 2 of the 5 guys so naturally they bunked together. i chose the guy with the NICEST tent ;)....
haha he had a cushony sleeping bag too =D ...anyways, we left the fire on thru the night, even though it was a controlled camp site, its still the OUTDOORS and i was a little concerned.

so we also played games in the dark, i wasnt too hot about that.. running AMOCK in the woods in the DARK.. where the animals are at an advantage cause their eyes are made to adjust better than mine. shit, i wouldnt know until i was being eaten by a tiger that something attacked me. granted the possibility of a tiger being at the campsite was close to none - BUT U NEVER KNOW.

woke up and ooo ate burgers and hot dogs AGAIN... packed up and left. drove out.... and well since we started out in rockford, we thought we'd drive back there and visit the botanical gardens and the river walk and the park. before we got to the botanical gardens we had to stop by at my friends place.. cause I REFUSED TO POOP/PEE OR EVEN GO BY the OUT HOUSES. i opened the door and there was a huge spider on the inside and a snake right by it. HMM HELL FUCKING NO. so we stopped by at my friends for some toilet use. i wanted to shower, but they wouldnt let me :(. so i was still dirty, but oh well i guess. everyone stunk, so it wasnt bad.

OMGGGGGGGGGGGG.. soooooooo prettyyyyyyy. there was a rose garden and ahhh... soo pretty. there were swan's and the sunset was phenominal. the houses are super cheap there, but still living on the river -- those people be RICH man. pictures follow, but lemme get thru talking first.. hahaha

so after the river walk and such.. totally poooped and decided to drive home. I MISSED MY BED. two nights of sleeping on the couch and then a sleeping bag.. i missed my lovely bed and real food. hahaha

ok ok ... here's a video of the pretty swans and ducks and geese in the lagoon which was slightly flooded in the botanical garden in rockford. the pretty sunset pictures are CLICK ME.

ok the picture upload thing is being a BITCH... so hmm i'll just post 'em later. just watch my boring video and well i'll share them later ;)