how suitable are you?

with most of my friends on the verge of getting married and my sister's infamous operation HANGMAN.. i have heard about billion possible guy/girl suitors for my friends/sister. today, just today i heard my mother say "he's a good straight forward guy without any bad habits." and i over heard my mother brag about my sister saying "oh yea, she's a good sedhi sadhi girl and she's never had non-vegetarian food, and no bad habits"

so with all the things that families look for in a SUITABLE GIRL.. i wondered if i would be a suitable girl... lets have a LOOKIE HERE!!!
1. slim girl - hahaha well im a healthy girl who doesnt obsess about being skinny. some traditional indians might call me FAT. so -100 for me
2. pure jain, goes to the temple, believes in god and doesnt eat meat = hmm in the past 3 years ive been to the temple 2 times, i don't really believe in god and I EAT MEAT ... -3000 for me. what oh insanity, i ate meat (insert face with jaw falling out) what a SIN that is, reserves a seat for me straight in hell. never mind the child molesters or people who kill others - me eating a peice of chicken is worse!!
3. doesnt drink or smoke - ive tried cigarettes, and i didnt like 'em... i love my beer and jeager and tequila too much to not ever have it - 200 for me. suddenly the label 'alcoholic' would be attached to my name and my "biodata" would be send to the recycling bin. hahaha
4. monogamous - well that would mean that the guy i marry is the ONLY ONE IVE KISSED and im not saying im a whore, but ive had 2 long term relationships so thats atleast 2 guys too many
-5000 for me. OMG, could you believe what a horrible girl i would be that two other men were with me and it didnt work out? there would be "ahh and oohhs" everywhere... what a UN PURE girl i am? who will accept this "tainted" girl -- oh my oh my!!
5. doesnt go to those "horrible" clubs and bars and dancing with those guys all close. hmm
- 10,000 for me. "rubbing against those unholy boys and girls.. omg soo promiscuous".. yes yes the "slut" title would be put behind my name and again in the recycle bin..
6. respects elders, doesnt talk back and etc... well i do, but i will stand up for my self and most people dont like that already so i'll go ahead and say -100 for me.
7. i have friends that are not all indian and yes i curse and OMG i wear tank tops, gives me the title of "americanized and non-traditional, ill mannered and disrespectful" ahh labeling and judging, how i love thee.

hahaha.. its soo weird, all these things are normal but when parents are trying to fix you up with someone else - these things turn into a big "dark" spot on your supposed resume. here's the WORSE PART - whether you are suitable or not is judged based upon these trifle things. no where was there an effort to actually get to know YOU. your personality has no room when it comes down to picking a potential suitor. other than my "citizenship status" there's nothing appealing to me on my biodata for potential parents of boys. I AM THANKFUL FOR THAT..
its not like you're trying to date someone, its like your're applying for a job and you're judged on a piece of paper. once you find 3 or 4 potential candidates you set up an interview, ask some pertinent Q's and decide based on an hour meeting if this guy's good enough. so i guess just like how i tweak my job responsibilities like "filing and copying" to "management and logging of data". just makes me sound more important eh?
here's some of the tweaking id have to do to make me SUITABLE enough.. lol atleast till the first meeting hahahaha...
so i like non-vegetarian food.. i would put on my biodata - im a connoisseur of food
i like drinking - i would put on my biodata - i like to try new things
i like going out/dancing/drinking and etc- i would put i am culturally sound and adventurous.

hahaha.. well the consensus is i am not suitable and im very glad about it.